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“You decide how the world perceives you. You tell him - I'm ugly and stupid, and he will treat you this way. You will tell him - I am wonderful, beautiful and wise, and you will see that he will throw himself at your feet "
How it's working
A lot of great people I know don't completely believe in themselves. Not only that, their self-esteem is very low, despite the fact that in many areas of their lives they are really admirable. Self-doubt is a psychological mechanism that prevents us from reaching for our dreams. We are looking for excuses, we have problems to complete even what we really care about. Where does such low self-esteem and lack of confidence in your own abilities come from?
Where to find the answer?
The answer should be sought in our childhood. Who was cutting your wings? Who doubted you? Mom? Dad? Grandparents? Teachers? Maybe you've heard all your childhood not to do this or that, because you won't make it, because you can't. Or maybe you wanted to deserve the love of your parents and you tried very hard. You cleaned your room, you got good grades, you were polite and yet you never heard any praise or anyone really appreciated you.
As an adult today, you probably have trouble accepting gifts or compliments. You feel better when you give someone a gift and you can always count on you.
What is insecurity?
it's the fear of rejection, the fear of not being accepted from the outside, the fear that I can't do it, that I'm not good enough. In fact, lack of self-confidence is lack of acceptance of yourself as you are. And you are wonderful. Just the way you are. And although you may find it hard to believe it when you read these words. That's how it is. If you doubt yourself, don't be surprised that others do it. People just confirm what you think about yourself. Your mind doesn't want to disappoint you and it's easier for it to convince you that you're worthless because someone once told you so.
summarizing
The good news is that the beliefs, patterns, and mechanisms you carry can be changed. When we learn to name our feelings, we can then control them and be aware of them. This is the first step to positive change.
If you feel that you cannot cope with your life and you need help, call or write. I will be happy to help you.
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